In the post-#metoo era, tropes some might have found romantic before are starting to look icky. the change was clear in the widespread reaction to @offsetyrn’s appearance at a @iamcardib concert, shown here in a photograph by scott dudelson/getty images, read about the reactions link in bio. on instagram, the actress @amandaseales posted a series of videos in response to a friend who had asked why she found offset’s behavior objectionable. “it’s toxic because it is somebody who has created the negativity in the situation trying to control the situation,” ms. seales said. some people saw his public gesture as a type of behavior that holds up an inequitable society and some said it was as a gesture of romance, 💭 ?
“it’s the devil’s playground,” a model who appears in a dating app campaign said of dating apps. “i try to avoid all that temptation.” tinder, @bumble, @grindr and other apps want you to love dating! (read the piece by @jonesieman - photo illustration by tracy ma/the new york times; stocksy (ecstatic person) both companies are pushing this message with recent advertising efforts. @tinder has a new publication, swipe life, specializing in personal essays that reinforce the idea that dating misadventures are cool, or at least exciting, invigorating and youthful. (the site’s “about” page compares downloading tinder to buying your first beer and losing your virginity.) what are your thoughts on online dating?
Almost ten years ago nadya suleman gave birth to eight babies at once, earning the nickname octomom and no end of media scrutiny, often cruel. where are she and her young ones today? there are 14 siblings in all, so many that they eat in shifts. some sleep on the couch. here she is at home with the most famous eight of her 14 children: noah, jonah, josiah, makai, nariyah, maliyah, jeremiah and isaiah, photographed by @jfpetersphoto (link in bio.) the octuplets are small for their age, but they’re polite, they cook, they’re vegan, they read two books a month and do their homework without being prompted. in spite of all of the horror stories in the tabloids since birth, they’re model fourth graders. link in bio to read about now she proved us all wrong.
When @tavitulle announced at the end of november that @rookiemag was folding, it didn’t just mean the end of the online magazine she founded at age 15. to many of her young readers, it signified the dissolution of a meeting place for a particular kind of girl: smart, self-serious and inclined to dream in color, writes jacklyn peiser. (link in bio to read the full piece) like this spread photographed by tony cenicola, from “rookie yearbook four,” one of the anthologies born of tavi gevinson’s digital magazine for teenage girls. “it was like your little personal haven,” said @petrafcollins, an artist and photographer who helped develop rookie’s aesthetic, and whose career was jump-started through rookie. “we were taking stuff that what was positioned as feminism and female joys and aesthetic and dirtying it up and making it fit.”
Mom, my ex-nemesis, allowed me just one glass of wine with the high-protein, low-fiber dinners she would cook me. my defenses down, i was losing my hair and the old hostility. “i’d take your place if i could,” she said through tears one night as she tucked me in bed. my mother couldn’t bear to see me suffering and afraid, even though i wasn’t the married southern belle she expected her daughter to be. and i couldn’t fight my mother and cancer at the same time. so we stopped fighting each other and fought my cancer together. — wrote page leggett in #tinylovestoriesnyt (link in bio for more.) modern love in miniature, featuring five reader-submitted stories of 100 words or fewer.
“playing ruth, her hair is pivotal. when she was younger, she followed the pressure of looking a certain way, from her clothes to her hair. but by the ’70s, that dissipated, and she evolved to her one look: the low ponytail. she loved the scrunchie and the hair scarf. for her, it was about being practical and saving time in the morning. she has kept that style for 30 years. it’s like karl lagerfeld or anna wintour. when you stick to one look, icon status is yours," said felicity jones on becoming ruth bader ginsburg. find out the actress’s beauty tips, and how she transformed into the supreme court justice for @onthebasisofsex.
Jovan hill, 25, dropped out of college and is unemployed. so how does he pay for his brooklyn apartment and marijuana habit? his social media followers chip in. “i’m very poor today,” said @ehjovan. “so if you want any tax write-offs, please donate to the jovan charity.” mr. hill, shown here at his apartment in a photograph by @gioncarlovalentine, is part of an emerging category of micro-influencers who have discovered there is a paying audience that wants to watch them go about their day-to-day lives. (read the link in bio) many have been able to make money on patreon, where people can sell subscriptions for their content, whether it be about comics, travel or nothing at all. and his followers are enthralled. he has carved out a space where crowdfunding is a form of audience participation. when he went to texas earlier this year for unpaid parking tickets, his followers sent him the money because they feared he might be arrested. “i didn’t even care, but they started sending money, saying, ‘you can’t tweet from jail,’” he said.
Chopped celery and squared potatoes waiting in the fridge. on the counter, a jug of water and a slow-cooker filled with dried peas. on the lid, a tiny note from my husband, the professional chef, to me, who burns water. “at noonish: 1. add water 2. add veggies 3. stir 4. plug in 5. forget.” his sweetly crooked handwriting. his unconditional faith in me. between steps 4 and 5, it hit me. married love is seldom about the grand gesture. sometimes it simply shows up as a recipe from your partner, helping you make a tasty p*t of soup. — wrote meagan fratiello in #tinylovestoriesnyt (read more, link in bio.) modern love in miniature, featuring five reader-submitted stories of 100 words or fewer.
Meet @museummammy, an art curator, writer and social activist, who spent three years as the social media manager for the metropolitan museum of art, where she was “responsible for building an imprint within the social sphere,” she said recently, photographed above by @june_canedo. she was also founder of the tumblr blog black contemporary art. link in bio to read all about her career and next moves.
Living in bangkok, i suffer from a common affliction in urban metropolises: among millions of people, i’m lonely. the fact that i am a shy foreigner makes new relationships difficult to cultivate. so i often fulfill my need for human intimacy through one of bangkok’s most widely available and affordable activities: massages. a one-hour massage per week easily turns into two hours, then three. four is a record set during one especially solitary stretch. for those hours, my body — contorted by confident, unyielding hands — returns to a childlike state; contained, safe and embraced. — wrote alastair mccready for #tinylovestoriesnyt (read more in the link in bio.) modern love in miniature, featuring five reader-submitted stories of 100 words or fewer.
Have you heard of orbiting? unlike ghosting, it's basically when an ex keeps looking at your stories, liking or commenting on your posts on instagram, snapchat or twitter without actually communicating with you. (kind of like this illustration by hanna barczyk shows.)in the last case, it’s as though the specter of a relationship that could have been is peeping over your shoulder, keeping tabs without having to commit to any real-world interactions. “one thing he didn’t stop doing, though, was watching my stories and liking photos on instagram,” said kristine mahan, 23, who has an ex stop responding to texts and snapchats all at once and without warning. at first she felt hurt by the silence and confused by her ex’s sustained surveillance of her online life. but after some time, ms. mahan came to see the behavior as a form of contact. “i felt the urge to send subliminal messages via my instagram stories, knowing that was the only way i could communicate with him,” she said, in the link in bio. is orbiting a form on contact? share your thoughts.
“i don't have to worry about seeing something objectifying and terribly jarring,” said sera smith, a 24-year-old from los angeles, said she has been visiting the lady cheeky #tumblr for three years and is drawn to the blog because it feels like a tasteful departure from sites like pornhub. “ it just feels like a safe space where things were curated for a variety of different social backgrounds and ethnic backgrounds.” but there have also been reports of nonconsensual pornography, or revenge porn, on the site, read the full article by @jonesieman and @katievanslyke. here, a photograph of their offices by micheal appleton. what are your thoughts on @tumblr’s recent decision to ban pornographic content on their site?